The Candy Man

That's what J.T. O'Sullivan should be called, because anytime he's on the field he's sure to give up something sweet to the defense. Leading the NFL in interceptions thrown, leading the NFL in fumbles, worst passer rating in the 4th quarter in the NFL. It's time for the douchetastic coach Mike Nolan to change careers to something he can handle, like selling hot dogs in the stands (but first, put Shaun Hill in as starting QB, he was able to produce wins at the end of last year).

It's high time for some house cleaning in Ninerville...starting with new owners, a new front office, a new head coach, a new offensive cordinator (sorry Mike Martz, everyone knows how to defend your shit-hole scheme...pressure the QB because you never do anything to the outside to keep the D-line honest) and draft a real QB that plays in a pro-style offense in college (unlike Alex Smith).

Don't Blog In The Nude

As some of you know, Washington Redskins' douchetastic tight end Chris Cooley likes to blog. What you didn't know is HOW he likes to blog.

Yesterday afternoon Chris Cooley posts on his website a picture of himself studying the Redskins playbook IN THE NUDE!!! When Cooley realized he'd flashed his little rice kernel over the Internet, he apologized immediately: "All apologies from the website. … We did not want to offend anyone. The picture wouldn’t have been up for so long, but we were in the middle of winning a big game. Once again, this was a complete accident, and we regret not reviewing the post more closely."

Wait....Was this taken in the locker room? If so, nothing says "sausage fest" more than 250 lb football players sitting around nude studying their playbook.

For a look at the picture, I direct you here. It is a little NSFW, and I do mean little.

Source: Yahoo Sports

Like the 2000 Presidential Election....RIGGED!

Is it me? Or was the Chargers vs. Bronco's game COMPLETELY RIGGED?!?!!

In the first quarter of the game, FUMBLE by San Diego!!! Or was it?!?!?! Norv Turner challenged the play. TV replays showed San Diego's Chris Chambers elbow on the grass while he had possession of the football as Bronco's Champ Bailey was trying to strip it away. The ball would have been marked as down, but the replay booth's machinery just HAPPENED to malfunction. So how about using the TV replays? Nope, can't do that! The NFL Officials don't have access to that. After two minutes of bullshitting, the call on the field stood. Denver had the ball at the Chargers 29.

But wait....That's not all!

Late in the fourth quarter on the Chargers 1 yard line.....Jay Cutler showed off his butter finger skills and fumbles the ball, only to be scooped up by San Diego linebacker Tim Dobbins. Everyone knew it was a fumble. Even Jay Cutler agreed in his douchetastic voice, "Fumble, I think." The ref blew his whistle when the ball came out, ruling it as an incomplete pass. A review showed that it should have been ruled a fumble. Because instant replay rules are lame, they don’t allow the opponent to gain possession in such situations. My FAVORITE PART is when the Ref came out and said, "All we can do to fix it is put the ball at the spot that it hit the ground, which is why we moved it back to the 10-yard line and the down counts and it becomes third down." WTF??!?!

After that the Broncos scored, and did the two point conversion for the win.

Now do we really need more proof that the NFL is rigged? I mean seriously. This is about as rigged as the 2000 Presidential Election....Or American Idol.

Dumb Ass

Attention whore for the Cincinnati Bengals, Chad Johnson, has legally changed his name. He is now known as "Chad Javon Ocho Cinco". The attention whore can now proudly display "Ocho Cinco" on his jersey like he did two years ago before the kick off of a game.

I am honestly convinced that the NFL puts something in the water that they give to make their players have multiple personalities. First Deion Sanders, then Terell Owens, then Brett Favre, now Chad Johnson! WTF?!??!

When asked why he did it one of Chad Johnson's personalities said, "It’s something I don’t think anyone has ever done before. Have I ever had a reason for why I do what I do? I’m having fun." I know what you can do for fun Chad....Walk in front of a bus! Why not?

Source: Yahoo Sports

We're back!

Like herpes....We're back!

Sorry for being away for so long, things happen....You have to deal with em. Blah blah blah, you don't want to hear about any of this. So we'll just give you what you really want.

And while we were gone....Brett Favre....You're a weenie.

Please retire

Dear Junior Seau,

You are one of the greatest line backers and history. But you know what....I don't like you. Why?

I think it started out for me back in 2002 when the Chargers were going against the Raiders, and you made a bet with then KUSI Sportscaster C.S. Keys (a Raiders fan) that you would dye your hair blonde if you guys lost to the Raiders. Well no shocker, the Chargers DID lose, and did you hold up to your promise? No. Like a little girl, you cried and refused to have your hair dyed. Shortly there after, you then got traded to the Dolphins. After your dismal years in Miami, you announced your retirement to the world in 2006.

But I guess making money from your Seau's resturaunt in San Diego just isn't enough. So then being the money-grubbing wanker that you are, you come out of retirement to get on a "Super Bowl" team. Only bad thing is that in 2006, you hurt yourself. Then in 2007, I remember you crying and hold Bill Bellicheck's hand saying "thank you", but just when you think you are going to win the Super Bowl, you have your ass handed to you by captain douchebag himself: Eli Manning and the NY Giants.

Now its up in the air if you are going to return for your 19th Season in the NFL. Junior: do yourself, your team, your fans, and the NFL a favor....RETIRE! You are a cry baby wanker that should be staying at home on his couch in the fetal position sucking your thumb like your normally do.

Source: Boston.Com

Vanderjagt plays in CFL. US relieved

Once named the most accurate kicker in the NFL, and after being cut by the Dallas Cowboys, Mike Vanderjagt returns to professional football to the only place that likes him: Canada.

Mike Vanderjagt has signed with the Toronto Argonauts, a team he use to play for back in the mid-80's before he left to go to the NFL for "fame and fortune". “When you fish and golf enough and you’re only 38 years old and you feel you can still do it. I miss the area and I miss my family and friends. It became a good opportunity, assuming Toronto wanted me, to be able to kick for a few more years," Mike Vanderjagt said in a press conference.

So I guess being called the "idiot kicker who got liquored up and ran his mouth off a lot" by Peyton Manning, being cut by the Dallas Cowboys, and attending training camps with the Broncos and the Kansas City Chiefs only no not get signed, and your depleting bank account; didn't make you want to go to Canada like a little baby? Riiiiight.

Source: Yahoo Sports